When you first announce a pregnancy, you’ll almost always hear something along the likes of: you have no idea how much you’ll love this child. I heard a version of this at least a dozen times. And don’t get me wrong, the moment that the doctor placed Lucy on my chest was easily the best moment of my life. A potent mixture of love, disbelief, and pure joy coursed through my body.
But in the weeks that followed…well, I felt slightly numb.
I loved Lucy but it wasn’t exactly like I’d been told…my love for her didn’t overwhelm me….and there were some days when I questioned if I was doing something wrong.
Falling in love with my daughter took time. But when it happened, it happened hard. I can say that today, after eight months of having Lucy in our lives, my love for her overwhelms me, scares me, motivates me, and surprises me. She brings me the deepest sense of joy that I’ve yet to experience. A joy so unadulterated that it often brings tears to my eyes. 
Lucy is eight months old now, and she can do so many things. She crawls everywhere and pulls herself up on everything she can get her hands on. Her highchair, our coffee table, my legs, our baby-gate. She talks with us now saying consonants like “da-da, na-na, ma-ma.” She still wants nothing more than for me to snuggle and nurse her during the night. I haven’t slept a solid eight hours in over eight months, and I’m okay with it. In fact, I’m thankful for those beautifully quiet moments we still share.
We go to mom and me yoga on Wednesdays, which we both love. We take long walks when the weather allows. We snuggle together in the morning, and we nurse, again and again, at night. She’s eight months old and means the world to both of us. We are so blessed to have her in our lives.
I have heard similar stories from several friends with their first babies. Everything is all so strange and new and overwhelming and it can take awhile for emotions to sort themselves out from the wonky hormones and sleeplessness. 🙂 I’m SO glad you have so much love for her now. 🙂
I just adore looking at these. My girl is turning 12 today! 🙂 ela
I actually think a lot of mothers feel this way, and it’s sad that it’s something that is never talked about! But maybe the sense of overwhelming love you eventually feel just fades out those first few weeks.
One of my sisters, many many years after her first daughter was born, told us she went through post partum depression, at a time when that was not even a clearly diagnosed problem. We are talking Brazil 40 years ago. She suffered and struggled a lot with it, but we had no idea. Well, I was a child then and of course clueless, but as an adult later, she told me all about it and I felt sorry she had to go through it all, feeling lonely, feeling odd, and disappointed at herself.
I don’t think you had this type of problem, and I don’t mean to imply that – I guess it is normal to have to sort through very intense feelings when a first baby is born. But your post made me remember my sister, so I shared her experience..
Eight months…. wow, that went by fast… she is sooooo beautiful!
ohhhhh happy 8 months Lucy! You are such an amazing mom, Monet 🙂
People can be so quick to tell you how you should feel, act etc that when you’re in the situation and your expectation doesn’t meet reality it really does make you feel like there’s something wrong with you when there isn’t. Lucille is such a little doll!
Monet, I absolutely love the way you write about Lucy. Honest, heartfelt and pouring over with love. I have a feeling I’ll feel the same way about my daughter when she arrives this spring! Sounds like it’s been an amazing 8 months with Lucy in your life. Thanks for sharing a glimpse into it!
Aw! So sweet!
She is so adorably chubby! It’s those baby cheeks. They won’t last forever, so kiss them while they’re there!
This is a beautifully honest post, Monet. Thank you for sharing. This path to falling in love seems more common than books and other media let on, so it’s important to share different perspectives, because really, we’re all different!
Sweet pictures, as always 🙂
Monet, your daughter is seriously the most beautiful baby ever :)! She is growing up so fast, and I always enjoy your posts, it makes me happy to see you enjoying her so much :)!
This is such a sweet post. I can’t imagine the love a mother can feel for their child, but reading your post gives me some idea. Happy 8 months Lucy!!!
Happy 8 months to the beautiful Lu! You’re a wonderful mum Monet – never forget that.
I cannot believe she is 8 months old! There is just no way that can be true… She is so precious and I know that you are such a great mother to her. Lucy is a very lucky girl!
I can’t believe it has been 8 months already!!
Cheers
Choc Chip Uru
Lucy is beautiful and I love how you’re sharing her with all of us! Kids are a long way away for me, if I ever have them, but I love to hear these great stories like yours. I think a few tiny bumps in the road make the smooth moments all the sweeter!
3 months, it’s amazing how fast time passes. She is so beautiful 🙂 It’s amazing how she changes.
So beautifully put. I love all of her little outfits. They always make me smile!
Lovely post — so nicely written. And great pictures. Thanks.
What a pretty little girl—her eyes are incredible….an old soul! =)